only child in a big family

I am an only child.  Well... technically I have step brothers and sisters but being that I haven't even met one of them and they became "family" after I was of the age of 18 I don't think they count as siblings. 

On the other hand my husband is the youngest of five.  Needless to say family gatherings are a little different at his house than mine.  I still remember our first Christmas at his house, we were engaged, and present opening was a free for all.  If it had your name on it just rip it open because no one was going to wait to see you open it and your reaction.  I remember commenting how different it was from what I was use to and one of his family members snapping at me, "you better get use to it" 

I cannot lie, after 10 years of marriage I am still not "use to it".  Sure I've adapted to their traditions but I still don't like that Thanksgiving takes place at three different tables in three different rooms or that the grandchildren are expected to spend the night at the grandparent's house multiple nights in a row inevitably exhausting them and making the majority of them sick. 

But there's a flip side to it too.  I've come to enjoy the laughs that are shared as more and more wine is shared.  I've enjoyed watching the friendships that my children have created with their cousins.  And even if I'm no where near good enough to play LOTR trivial pursuit, Mt. Doom will forever live in my heart. 

And so it is what it is.  Not always easy, not always fun or comfortable, but in the end it is family and they are a huge blessing.  And I think it is pretty indicative of life.  There are things that our Lord wants us to do that are not always easy, or fun, or comfortable, but it is for him and his kingdom, and in the end we are better people for it. 

And as I look at the people around me I wonder how many will ride this wave of hard times with us and how many will refuse to sit at three different tables?  How many will stick around and accept what it is because we're family and that love should conquer all other trivial issues we may have?

Make a Difference Mon... Tuesday?

Anyone who listens to K-Love knows they do Make A Difference Monday where they encourage you to do something to make a difference in the life of someone else - it can be something big, it can be something small, just do something. 

So a few weeks ago a single mom posted how she is out of work but that her son is really in to trains and how she'd like to get him a train set for Christmas.  I didn't really think anything of it.  Easy to just look away right?  But then a week or two later it hit me, duh, we have a Geotrax set in our basement, collecting dust.  My kids haven't played with it in months (years?) but it still works great.  I've thought about selling it but haven't.  And by then I couldn't find that email, maybe I didn't try hard enough (sorry Lord, that's my fault) but it was on my heart and I didn't find it - ugh!

She just posted again (thank you Lord!) so we've been emailing and she's super excited to give this set to her son for Christmas!  And I'm super excited to give it to her! 

So today I challenge, encourage, suggest, implore of you to try to do something, anything, to make a difference in the life of someone.  Call an old friend, your grandma, pay for someone's starbucks, say you're sorry, give money to a favorite charity, invite your ex-mother-in-law to your child's play, read a book or two with your child, anything.  Make a difference and see what a difference it makes in your life. 

God is Awesome!

Yesterday there was much excitement among my friends.  Our good friend gave birth to her miracle baby girl at 31 weeks.  Both momma and baby are doing great!  Sadly however our friend lost her daughter's twin back in August at 19 weeks and that sweet little angel will never be forgotten. 

There is a local jeweler here in Colorado that makes remembrance necklaces, Bugaboo Jewelry and she is having a giveaway on The Hand That Rocks the Cradle.  I would love to win one for my good friend because I think it would be an awesome gift to celebrate both of her little girls.  If you or someone you knows has lost a precious little one I would encourage you to head over to this giveaway as well. 

blocking black friday

Have you ever read the book The Five Love Languages?  If you haven't I highly recommend it.  It is a fabulous book about how different people give and perceive love in different ways.  For me my love language is gifts.  Which my husband has had a hard time with, he hears gifts and he hears materialism.  Which isn't what it is about at all.  For me getting a gift says "I was thinking about you when you were not around and I know you well enough to know that you would love this".  And for me giving a gift is the same thing, it is seeing something that reminds me of you and getting it for you as a token of my love for who you are.   

So you can bet how much I love Christmas.  But its probably not like what you think.  I love the traditions of Christmas, I love the tree and the baking and spending time with your loved ones.  And I do love shopping for the perfect present.  What I don't like is what black friday is to so many people, what the retailers have made it. 

My family, like many families live on a budget, and that includes Christmas.  I have shared in previous posts but I will share here that we only give each other three gifts at Christmas - something you want, something you need, and we each draw names so that the children can get in on the fun as well.  The something you want tends to be the big present for the kiddos, the something  you need tends to be something like new shoes, clothes, etc. and then the name draw is a smaller present but the kids absolutely LOVE getting to shop and what the pick is priceless.

So I'm pretty much done shopping, I need to get a few things here and there, we still have to shop for my husband's family but their name pulling tradition has prevented us from doing it yet. 

And then rolls around black friday.  Perhaps you LOVE black friday?  You look forward to it every year.  I've shopped it in the past, never at 3 a.m., never camping out, but I've gone.  I enjoy Target's cheap DVDs because my husband loves to watch movies and they make great stocking stuffers.  But ultimately I do not like what Black Friday represents, the need to buy more because you think you're getting a great deal and ultimately, what the retailers hope, is spending more too. 

If you have to put an item on credit and spend the next six months paying 16% interest on your purchase that deal is not a deal. 

If you're buying to get the most possible under the tree what are you really doing?  And what message are you sending?  I can spend $100 on ten gifts that will be quickly forgotten, broken, lost or I can spend $65  on that one very wanted Harry Potter Lego set and save $45 to put towards groceries, the braces fund, a rainy day.  My son will only have one present to open but guess what will get more use and is a better value. 

So I've decided that instead of going out with my inlaws on black friday like they love to do I am going to stay at home with my children and make ginger bread houses.  I'm going to block black friday and the unnecessary spending.  And instead I'm going to gain a new tradition with my kids.  I think I've made a priceless trade. 

we can learn at home

Today we had so much fun practicing the letter A, we read books, did patterns, put together a puzzles, did apples biggest to smallest and painted with do a dots - seriously those bingo ladies are on to something!!! 

I've never played with do-a-dots before but I got them at Micheal's and was pleasantly surprised.  They were easy enough for my 2-year old to use but entertaining for my 4 year old too. As you can see from the picture they are nice and big and easy for the smaller hands to grasp and manipulate.  

I think I'll make a turkey sheet that they can decorate with do-a-dots next week. 

But today reassured me that yes I can teach my children and it can be fun.  We had a blast hanging out together doing this stuff and I felt so good when we finished.  I'm super excited for next week when we focus on what we are thankful for.  Even my oldest who goes to a public school is excited to be off next Wednesday to do "school" with us!

the best laid plans...

What's the saying?  The best laid plans of mice and men? 


Today we were going to start homeschooling with the letter A and an apple theme.  Books were ready, activities set.  Yup, that's what we were going to do. 

Until I drove my middle son to the ER at midnight due to an asthma attack we couldn't couldn't control.  And then had to stay there for three hours free and clear of symptoms before we were allowed to go home. 

Thank God, he's okay.  Asthma is scary and frustrating.  The ER is scary and frustrating, especially about 2:30 a.m. 

But he's tired today, and super croaky.  And he didn't have any energy and neither did I. 

But it's okay but today made me realize a couple of things.  Being at the ER stunk but at no point was I worried about either having to call in to work the next morning or how tired I would be the next day.  Or having to pay for childcare days I couldn't use because he was sick.  Or taking him somewhere where he'd be exposed to more germs and potentially make him sicker while his immune system was already down. 

Nope, none of those thoughts crossed my mind because family comes first right now.  And I love that.  I cannot go back in twenty years and give my children the childhood I wished I had given them, now is the time, the only time, I have to do it right, the way I want to, the way they want me to. 

Because it is on the good days that we make memories, it is on the bad that we use those memories to heal our hurts. 

Giving presents vs being present

I'm a huge fan of just spending time with my kiddos, I think is insanely important and just as much a gift to me as it is to them.  And I know that in 20 years my son isn't going to say, "so my mom got me haggrid's hut lego set for Christmas when I was 8 and it was AWESOME, she is the best mom ever".  However, I'd like to think he'll remember the time we spent together and the traditions that we did year after year.

So a few years ago my husband and I set up a few "rules" about Christmas to try and make it more about the time together than what's under the tree.  We only give each kid (and each other) three presents.  1. Something you want 2. Something you need 3. All five of us draw each other's names and pick a special present for that person, that gets the kids involved and thinking about other people and then of course Santa always brings something too but I cannot control that man, I mean really, who can so what he does is his business.

http://twelvecraftstillchristmas.blogspot.com/

And while that is all great fun I'd like to start including more tradition type activities in to our life.  So I think Elf on a Shelf will be making an appearance this year and making mischief for the month of December.  And I'd like to dedicate one day in December to making the same thing every year, i.e. popcorn balls, cookies, something, and then have the kids wrap and give them out every year to teachers, neighbor's etc.  (something we've done in the past but never the same thing, making a day of it, etc.)

So with traditions fresh on my brain I was wicked excited when one of my very favorite blogs, Telve Crafts Till Christmas, announced that for the next two weeks or so she will be having guest bloggers share their family's traditions!  I encourage you to stop by, read up and maybe you'll find something just for your family.  






So, what's your tradition?

Gratitude - days 2 - 5

I knew it was too much to think that I could keep up here, so I will catch up instead:

Day 2
Today I am thankful for brothers.

Crossing the street today my hands were full with groceries and J.  The boys took each other's hand to cross the road without having to be told, without complaining, they just did it.  I am blessed that my kids have such a good relationship.

Day 3
Today I am thankful for my dog, for as much as he drives me up the wall with his bad habits and his general mischievousness, he truly is a good dog.  He's funny and spunky.  But most of all he loves each kid to pieces, he is amazing with them and super loyal to each of them.  If they are having a bad day, are sick or just need some general love he is there.  And if they chase him around, pull his tail and generally annoy him, he is still there.

Day 4
Today I am thankful friends.  I am thankful for old friends, I am thankful for new friends.  I am thankful for friends that I see all the time and friends that I never get to see.

I have one of the most amazing bunch of friends, they come from all walks of life, more often than not they have children, but not all of them.  Some are older than me, some are younger.  Some work, some stay home, some do one and wish they were doing the other.  Some have husbands, some do not.  Some have watched my children for me.  Some have seen how messy my house can get and don't care.  Some have brought me meals to celebrate births or help out during a hard time.  Some shoulder's I have cried on, some have cried on mine.  Some I've prayed with, all I've laughed with.  We've gone shopping together, we've knitted together, we've made our children play together so we could have some adult time.  Some I've volunteered with, some I've worked with.  You've helped me when I'm trying to raise awareness or money or something else for a cause.  You've bought school fundraisers from my children.

But what makes each and every one of you amazing and such a blessing in my life is that at your core is a phenomenal women, with a loving, supportive, awesome heart.   At your core is someone I strive to be.

I love you guys, thanks for loving on me.

Day 5
Today I am thankful humor.  Humor gets me through most situations, anyone who knows me knows I love to poke fun at things.  It is just who I am.  But I especially love that which shouldn't be funny yet is (Headlines anyone?)

Today John was sexing the mic, they're getting a little frisky and we needed to separate the genders.  (for anyone who doesn't know we are on our third litter, littler 2 and 3 are from sister from the first litter and only 3 days apart in age, we currently have 13 babies)  We looked last week but didn't separate because they were still nursing.  Well the boys are naughty and feisty and one bit John.  To which John instinctively flipped his hand and shot this poor little mouse in to the pantry.  T caught the baby no problem and he was fine.

So today John brings out the babies to officially sex them and J tells him in her 2 year old wisdom, "Don't drop baby mice over there (pointing at the pantry) k dad?"

30 days of gratitude

So I've started a project on facebook - 30 days of gratitude, I thought I would try to keep up with it here too, but no promises! 

Today I am thankful that back rubs are still much loved activities in my house and that they cure boo-boos as well as put little ones to sleep.  There is something so therapeutic about rubbing a little one's back, for both of us.   

When my daughter fell asleep in my lap while I was rubbing her back today it also gave me time to think.  I'm excited to start homeschooling.  We're going to start next week, I've purchased calendars and letter and number posters, I've checked out a bunch of books for the letter A from the library as well as some general resources about homeschooling.  I purchased a rockin A-Z curriculum from Confessions of a Homeschooler for only $10!  Seriously, even if you don't homeschool but have young kiddos at home $10 is a wicked good deal!  I'm going to try to sew each kiddo their own pillow to sit on while we do calendar and cuddle on while we read together. 

I also looked at fun things at Micheal's that I want to get but I didn't have my 40% off coupon because my Sunday paper was delivered yesterday - dude!